Monday, May 11, 2009

FSP's Perfect Mother's Day

Here is my idea of an ideal Mother's Day, an ideal that I attain most years, including this one:

1. I sleep as late as I want. I get to do this anyway on weekends unless there is some particular early activity scheduled, so this is not an unusual event but is something I always appreciate.

2. I spend a few hours ambling around the house and garden with cats and family on a sunny day or at least a not-stormy day.

3. I spend a few hours of quiet uninterrupted time in my office on campus.

4. I spend some time at a cafe, either alone with something to read/write or compute (and maybe edit.. but that is slightly less than ideal) or with a friend to chat or with a daughter who reads/draws/chats.

5. In the evening I have an interesting dinner at home or at a restaurant. When we dine at home, my husband typically cooks, so I don't need a break from cooking but maybe he will also do the ancillary preparation and clean-up -- my jobs -- on my Ideal Mother's Day. This dinner most certainly involves a special dessert, preferably acquired at a store or bakery because, although my husband cooks, he does not do (or even appreciate) desserts.

I don't care about flowers or cards or other gifts, although I don't mind if my daughter brings home a sad little seedling that she planted as part of a Mother's Day class project and/or a weird poem about how wonderful I am. One year she brought home a drawing of me, and that was kind of disturbing.

The quietness of my ideal M-Day may relate in part to the fact that by this time of the academic year, I am exhausted. In fact, this year I am really exhausted.

Other possible features of an ideal day, none of which has yet occurred but I can dream:

- When my husband calls his mother, I am somewhere far far away. If I am in the same house, I can hear her voice on the phone even if my husband and I are in different rooms. She is always complaining about something or worrying about something. It is like having a pneumatic drill go off near (or on) your head.

- No students email me to whine about their grades or beg for extra credit or tell me about their illnesses, medications, or vehicular woes.

- NSF gives me a grant.

- My most obnoxious colleague announces his retirement, effective immediately.

- My most stupid cat (not shown in photograph) decides that, for the first time in his life, he is on the right side of the door.

6 comments:

  1. Anyone ask for more time for an assignment because they were in jail? (Yup, true story.)

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  2. "My most stupid cat (not shown in photograph) decides that, for the first time in his life, he is on the right side of the door."

    Aren't they all like this, even the smart ones?

    Have you seen this?

    http://www.youtube.com/user/simonscat

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  3. If I am in the same house, I can hear her voice on the phone even if my husband and I are in different rooms. She is always complaining about something or worrying about something.The thing is, having somebody listen to her complaints is probably her ideal Mother's Day. Such are the realities of certain parents.

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  4. I think all of your possible ideal features would make ANY day a more perfect day, not just Mother's Day. It seems like you had a good one, anyway!

    PS-Your cat is beautiful!

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  5. Interesting - your views on your mother-in-law. My first reaction was that's not nice. She's his mother. You shouldn't be thinking that way of her.

    But I can't stand my mother-in-law either. I mean she is so thoroughly awful in the way she frames things; her put upon attitude; for the way she treats me; for being an alcoholic fruitcake and a nurse that too.

    My biggest fear - I'll become like her.

    Oh how I love griping anonymously

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  6. LOL!

    Maybe a massage or bubble bath would be nice, too?

    Sounds like a good day all around. Too bad you have to have kids to deserve one of these good days...

    p.s. a comment on the role mothers play? the verification word is "survers"

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